Ghosting, the abrupt cessation of communication without explanation, can be emotionally challenging, leaving you feeling rejected and anxious. Whether it's from a romantic interest, friend, or potential study partner, being left in the lurch can take its toll on your mental health.
Here are some practical strategies to help protect your well-being from the emotional rollercoaster of ghosting.
Practice self-compassion
Ghosting reflects the other person's inability to communicate or manage their emotions, not your worth. Be kind to yourself and don't blame yourself for their actions. Understand that the pain from ghosting can trigger a feeling of rejection. It's ok to be hurt by ghosting; being ghosted is painful! This is especially the case if you hoped that the relationship would be an ongoing or meaningful one. Embrace self-compassion.
Set boundaries
Establishing emotional boundaries in the early stages of a relationship can help you maintain a sense of self and emotional stability. Make it clear what you expect in terms of communication and commitment. Such a proactive approach might help you gauge the other person’s intentions and protect you from the emotional toll of being ghosted. With that said, if a person decides to ghost you they will, which brings us to how to change your perspective.
Change your perspective
Ask yourself what you can take from the experience and recognise that someone who ghosts lacks the qualities needed for a mature, healthy relationship. Shifting your perspective can help you regain a sense of control and reduce the emotional impact of being ghosted.
Build resilience
Focus on enhancing your resilience. Engage in physical activity, prioritise sleep, maintain a balanced diet, practice mindfulness or meditation, and find meaning and purpose in your life.
Limit exposure to triggers
If you find that certain social media platforms or mutual social circles are triggering, it may be beneficial to limit your exposure to these environments. This can help you avoid unnecessary emotional distress and focus on healing. Take breaks from social media if needed to protect your mental well-being.
Why do people ghost?
Understanding why ghosting happens can provide some clarity and help ease the confusion and hurt it can cause.
Here are some common reasons behind ghosting:
- Loss of interest: Sometimes, people lose interest in a connection but struggle to communicate this effectively.
- Fear or anxiety: The thought of taking a virtual connection to the next level, like meeting in person, can overwhelm some individuals.
- Personal issues: Life can throw unexpected challenges our way, causing some to withdraw from online interactions without explanation.
- Fear of confrontation: Some people ghost because they're afraid of hurting your feelings or simply don't know how to handle the situation.
- Lack of communication skills: For others, discussing their feelings and intentions might seem unnecessary or intimidating, leading them to choose disappearance over conversation.
- Commonality: In today's dating culture, ghosting has unfortunately become so common that some view it as an acceptable way to end a relationship without facing confrontation.
Remember, being ghosted doesn't diminish your worth. Hold your head high, maintain your dignity, and know that someone better suited for you may be out there.
As you navigate the academic and personal demands of university life, remember to explore the realities of managing mental health and utilise the resources available to provide support. Your well-being is important, and there are avenues to help you thrive.